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Crackers are just a sub-category of biscuits


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So yesterday I had an argument with TheApprentice about the fact I called these so called "crackers" biscuits. The "crackers" in question are as seen below.
IMG_1065.jpg

The only thing about it is the fact that crackers is in the name, otherwise I see no reason to not call this a biscuit. Besides, when you go to the shops to buy "crackers", what isle do you go to? The biscuit isle, since there is no dedicated cracker isle. Henceforth fuck your incorrect opinion Apprentice, crackers are just a sub-category of biscuits.

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Ok Motherfucker, let us start at a solid ground first
By GOOGLES definition;
What defines a cracker: 

3.
a thin dry biscuit, typically eaten with cheese.
"the sausage is delicious on hot toast or crackers"
  • a light crisp made of rice or tapioca flour.

    "prawn crackers"


    What Defines a biscuit:

    1.
    a small baked unleavened cake, typically crisp, flat, and sweet.
    "a chocolate biscuit"


    In my personal experience, and how I ultimately define the difference between a cracker and a biscuit;
    A cracker typically consists of a bland taste, although there are variants which can contain a light flavoring, a cracker is usually something you can add condiments on top of such as cheese/salami/dip to name only a small fraction. It is also important to mention the significance of the term "cracker" in relation to the infamous Cheese Platters, given you never see a "Biscuit" on a Cheese Platter. Per the photo linked above, such an item could very well be eaten on it's own and enjoyed equally on its own, however it is very common to see this particular food item presented as one of a few options within a cheese platter, ultimately granting that food item the title of Cracker over Biscuit.

    A biscuit however, I believe to be the minority in this scenario, a biscuit can very easily be defined as the opposite of a cracker, something that is enjoyed purely on it's own and does not need the addition of other condiments. To do so would violate the natural order of things and cause havoc across the universe. To grant the title of Biscuit, would mean that the discussed food item be flavorsome enough on it's own and need not any other forms of food added on top of it.

    SO, Wilfred, you calling that Cracker a fucking biscuit is extremely wrong under the Cheese Platter Rule given that they clearly hold a minimal taste and appearance, and can very easily be made better by the use of other condiments. You have no fucking right calling that a Biscuit and you should be fucking ashamed of yourself.
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Just now, Stell said:

Ok Motherfucker, let us start at a solid ground first
By GOOGLES definition;
What defines a cracker: 

3.
a thin dry biscuit, typically eaten with cheese.
"the sausage is delicious on hot toast or crackers"
  • a light crisp made of rice or tapioca flour.

    "prawn crackers"


    What Defines a biscuit:

    1.
    a small baked unleavened cake, typically crisp, flat, and sweet.
    "a chocolate biscuit"


    In my personal experience, and how I ultimately define the difference between a cracker and a biscuit;
    A cracker typically consists of a bland taste, although there are variants which can contain a light flavoring, a cracker is usually something you can add condiments on top of such as cheese/salami/dip to name only a small fraction. It is also important to mention the significance of the term "cracker" in relation to the infamous Cheese Platters, given you never see a "Biscuit" on a Cheese Platter. Per the photo linked above, such an item could very well be eaten on it's own and enjoyed equally on its own, however it is very common to see this particular food item presented as one of a few options within a cheese platter, ultimately granting that food item the title of Cracker over Biscuit.

    A biscuit however, I believe to be the minority in this scenario, a biscuit can very easily be defined as the opposite of a cracker, something that is enjoyed purely on it's own and does not need the addition of other condiments. To do so would violate the natural order of things and cause havoc across the universe. To grant the title of Biscuit, would mean that the discussed food item be flavorsome enough on it's own and need not any other forms of food added on top of it.

    SO, Wilfred, you calling that Cracker a fucking biscuit is extremely wrong under the Cheese Platter Rule given that they clearly hold a minimal taste and appearance, and can very easily be made better by the use of other condiments. You have no fucking right calling that a Biscuit and you should be fucking ashamed of yourself.

Alright cunt lets do this then.

First off, the fact you had to pull definition 3 for crackers as opposed to using the first definition for biscuits speaks enough volumes on its own. 

Your experience of the difference between crackers and biscuits is absolutely accurate. However based on your response I can see you clearly have never had this specific brand. I find these savories hold more flavor on their own than most other biscuits, I would it is hard to choose a favorite between Chicken Crimpy biscuits and these Fantastic ones. Now I personally believe it utterly kills to mix these Fantastic savories with anything else, and should purely be enjoyed on their own. However for the psychopaths out there they do appear on platters. 

Perhaps they are both a biscuit and a cracker, but you fail to make an argument against crackers just being a sub-category of biscuits, so I assume you agree.

Overall, calling those "CrAcKeRs" biscuits is not fucking wrong so you can shove your Cheese Platter rule up your ass and I recommend you go out and try a pack just to comprehend the level of flavor these magnificent creations hold. I have every right to call it a biscuit and you will never convince me otherwise, you should be ashamed of yourself for the fact you have never tried one of these biscuits.

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4 minutes ago, Zombie Wilfred said:

Alright cunt lets do this then.

First off, the fact you had to pull definition 3 for crackers as opposed to using the first definition for biscuits speaks enough volumes on its own. 

Your experience of the difference between crackers and biscuits is absolutely accurate. However based on your response I can see you clearly have never had this specific brand. I find these savories hold more flavor on their own than most other biscuits, I would it is hard to choose a favorite between Chicken Crimpy biscuits and these Fantastic ones. Now I personally believe it utterly kills to mix these Fantastic savories with anything else, and should purely be enjoyed on their own. However for the psychopaths out there they do appear on platters. 

Perhaps they are both a biscuit and a cracker, but you fail to make an argument against crackers just being a sub-category of biscuits, so I assume you agree.

Overall, calling those "CrAcKeRs" biscuits is not fucking wrong so you can shove your Cheese Platter rule up your ass and I recommend you go out and try a pack just to comprehend the level of flavor these magnificent creations hold. I have every right to call it a biscuit and you will never convince me otherwise, you should be ashamed of yourself for the fact you have never tried one of these biscuits.

First off, consider the absolute fact that google is just retarded and the actual order of definitions doesn't make any fucking difference given it's literally just based off of context.

You also fail to recognise I have been on this planet longer than you and have eaten more packs of those Fantastic crackers than you could ever comprehend retard.
And you mention this "Sub-category" bullshit, to truly determine that would require research i am too lazy to gather at this time but, will eventually provide given enough reason to, alas i do not agree to anything.
I am fully aware of the supremacy of these Fantastic crackers, but they can still be made better, and improved upon by other items of food, which in the end, grant it the title of Cracker

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this thread isn't fucking over, I will return with full and proper history/lore on this topic, I will create case studies, I will go beyond fucking anything to prove you wrong wilfred. Time is the only thing keeping you safe.

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3 hours ago, Stell said:

this thread isn't fucking over, I will return with full and proper history/lore on this topic, I will create case studies, I will go beyond fucking anything to prove you wrong wilfred. Time is the only thing keeping you safe.

Facts also keep me safe, you will NEVER be able to prove me wrong.

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